To Mommy on Her 75th Birthday

Mommy’s Gifts of

Music, Love, and Faith 

Unang-una, sa ngalan na aking mga kapatid at ng aming mga pamilya, gusto kong magpasalamat sa inyo sa inyong pagdalo sa pagdiriwang natin ng kaarawan ni Mommy.

Gusto ko rin magpasalamat sa pagmamahal at pakikipagkaibigan ninyo kay Mommy.

May mga ilan sa inyo, katulad ni Mother Trina, na mas madalas makasama ni Mommy kaysa sa amin. Paminsan-minsan nag-tetext ako kay Mommy para mangamusta at nagugulat ako sa mga reply niya. Hi Land, nasa Pagudpod ako kasama si Mother Trina. Hi Land nasa Cebu ako o di kaya’y Davao, kasama si Mother Trina. (At hindi ko akalain na sumasakay si Mommy ng bangka at mayroon siyang boyfriend sa bawat seminaryo)

May mga ilan sa inyo na kilala na si Mommy bago pa kami ipanganak, tulad ni Tito Vic na kilala si Mommy mula ng kanyang panganganak at ni Tito Buddy at Tito Cho na kilala ni Mommy mula ng kanilang panganganak.

May mga ilan sa inyo na nag-alaga kay Mommy noong siya ay batang-bata pa tulad ni Ma’am Dela Cruz. At marami sa inyo ang inaalagaan ni Mommy at dahil para na rin kayong anak ni Mommy, para ko na rin kayong mga kapatid.

Muli, maraming salamat sa inyong pagmamahal at pakikipagkaibigan sa Mommy namin, sa Mommy nating lahat. 

---

At siyempre, sa ngalan ng aking mga kapatid at ng aming mga pamilya, at sa ngalan ninyong lahat, gusto kong magpasalamat kay Mommy.

Nung hinahanda ko ito, tinanong ko sa sarili ko, what am I most thankful to mommy for? Sa tingin ko may tatlong bagay: the gift of music, the gift of love and the gift of faith.

First, the gift of music. All of us in the family love music and I think we got that from Mommy. Some of us, lalo na si Kuya Lenny, aka the singing doctor at si Kuya Jun, are doubly blessed. They inherited Mommy’s love for music and Mommy’s beautiful voice. Kami ni Ate Nette, we love music, period. Pero dahil pinahawak na rin naman sa akin ng aking mga kapatid yung mike, baka kumanta na rin ako maya-maya habang may pagkakataon.

Mommy loves to sing. Siya lang ang lector na kumakanta at may karapatang kumanta. May mga ibang lector na nagtatangkang kumanta pero wala namang karapatang kumanta. Si Mommy lang ang nag pre-preaching na kumakanta at nagpapaluha ng mga nakikinig. I also remember in Bangkok, we would have guests of my father at our house for dinner and my mother would sing Pilita Corrales songs: Dahil Sa ‘Yo, Kapantay ay Langit.

In fact, a few years ago, Mommy recorded a CD (if you want a copy, just let me know) and when my daughter Sinta was newly born, she refused to sleep unless we played the CD of her lola singing.

Mommy would also tell us that while she was going through labor with each one of us, she would sing religious songs to help her endure the pain (especially since she has a hyper-allergy to all medicines). Maybe that is why we all ended up loving music. 

When I am sad, I often remember Mommy and her favorite song,

Smile, though your heart is aching,

Smile even though it’s breaking.

When there are clouds in the sky, you’ll get by

If you smile through your tears and sorrow

Smile then maybe tomorrow

You’ll see the sun come shining through for you.

Light up your face with gladness

Hide every trace of sadness

Although a tear may be ever so near

That’s the time you must keep on trying

Smile, what’s the use of crying

You’ll find that life is still worthwile

If you just smile

So even if Mommy is not there beside me during those sad or trying moments, it is as if she is.

Thanks Ma, from all of us for the gift of song.

The second gift of Mommy to us is the gift of love. But for us, Mommy’s gift of love is not a generic kind of motherly love but a love that is highlighted by sacrifices. It was only recently that I realized how much Mommy sacrificed for us and especially for Daddy. Mommy had a very successful career here in the Philippines in the public school system. Her students loved her and some of them would even frequent our house and call her their Mommy. Ang dami kong kapatid. There is a Jesuit, Fr. Noel Vasquez, who was Mommy’s student and without fail, the first thing he does when he sees me is to ask about Mommy.

But when Daddy was taking his PhD at Stanford and needed help and needed her, Mommy gave it all up and rushed to his side, performing odd jobs to help make ends meet and help to type and re-type his dissertation.

This must not have been easy for her. Leaving behind her children, Kuya Lenny, Ate Nette, Ate Lu, and Kuya Jun who back then were still young (there’s a picture of them when they will still young. Wala pa ako noon. Inalagaan sila ni lolo at ng aming mga tito) She also left behind her career.

She did come back and restart her career but even in her everyday life, there was sacrifice. We were all breast fed and mommy would come home from work every lunchtime to make sure we were fed. (Siguro kaya hindi kami tabain)

But the restart was short-lived and in 1979, Mommy, Kuya Jun and I were off to Bangkok and again, the sacrifice: leaving behind Kuya Lenny, Ate Nette and Ate Lu and leaving behind her career and never being able to restart a career.

I guess that was a painful moment in her life and in the lives of my brothers and sisters. Honestly, I was too young and too happy to understand. It was the story of a family working its way out of the farms of San Miguel, Bulacan and the public schools of Quezon City to eventually make it to the United Nations and for us children to make it to U.P. and Ateneo.

For her gift of a sacrificing love, we are thankful to Mommy.

The third gift of Mommy to us is the gift of faith. When Mommy was growing up, she wanted to become a nun. (That’s a recent picture of my mom dressed up as a nun) That was before she met my dad. And I think she finally agreed to marry my dad because he told her that her greatest gift to him was the gift of faith.

Her gift of faith to Daddy is also her gift of faith to us. Whenever we are faced with what Mommy tells us are trials, there are two words that Mommy always tells us and I’m sure my sister and my brothers know these two words very well, “Have Faith”.

And these are not just words of admonition but also words she lives out. Eighteen years ago years ago, Mommy was diagnosed with late-stage colon cancer and what made her condition worse was that she has a hyper-allergy to all sorts of medicines. But look at her now, can any of you believe that she is 75? I was telling my wife recently that I can’t believe Mommy is 75. She doesn’t look 75. She still looks young, she is still going strong, she is still going out to the provinces preaching. And the only thing that sustained her, the only thing that accounts for her longevity are prayers, her faith.

My daughter, Sinta, was born with a condition that makes her more sickly than most children. In fact, she almost didn’t make it to the party tonight because she has been sickly since January with recurring coughs and fever. Every time she gets moderately sick, I text Mommy and ask for her prayers because I know na malakas si Mommy sa Diyos. And always, she would text me back, “Have Faith”.

In my case, I think Mommy’s greatest gift is the gift of faith. When I thought about this, I asked myself, is the greatest gift then the gift of faith and not the gift of love unlike what St. Paul teaches us in Corinthians? I think there is no contradiction. The gift of faith is the gift of love, it is the gift of a love for a God who loved us first, who is the giver of our loving. And because we know that he loves us, because we have faith in his love, we have faith in him. It is an understanding that like Jesus, our principal relationship is our relationship with God. So I say it again, Mommy’s greatest gift to me is the gift of faith.

I have learned that Mommy has learned to love a song by the Jesuits entitled “Huwag Kang Mangamba” and I think it nicely ties together these two gifts of faith and love.

Sa tubig kita sasagipin.
Sa apoy ililigtas man din.
Ako ang panginoon mo at diyos.
Tagapagligtas mo at tagatubos.

Huwag kang mangamba.
Di ka nagiisa.
Sasamahan kita.
Saan man magpunta.
Ika'y mahalaga.
Sa aking mga mata.
Minamahal kita.
Minamahal kita.

If in my youth, I most associated Mommy with the song Smile, I think now, I will associate Mommy more with this song, Huwag Kang Mangamba, especially because it ties up everything in a neat package, Mommy’s gift to us of music, love and faith.

We know it is your birthday, Mommy, but we are the ones who want to thank you for these your gifts to us and several other gifts that you have given us throughout your 75 years.